"...for He is mighty to save."

On a more serious note...

This month marks four years since I left on my mission and I've had a lot of time to reflect on the goals and plans that I had for this point in my life.  I often think of the phrase "Man plans, God laughs" and how true it is.  I am constantly reminding myself that my Heavenly Father does indeed have a plan for me and that that plan includes a journey, and not merely a destination.  And even though I am not where I planned to be, I am in the place that I'm supposed to be.  I am not a failure.
Abraham Lincoln once said,


"I do the very best I know how; the very best I can; and I mean to keep doing so until the end.  If the end brings me out all right, what is said against me won't amount to anything."


Sometimes it is all we can do to stay strong and carry on.  Sometimes our individual trials may seem like they outweigh any possibility of ever overcoming them.  And maybe every last fiber of our being feels like it has been shredded.  When I get to that point, I try to remember this quote from President Monson:


"Mortality is a period of testing, a time to prove ourselves worthy to return to the presence of our Heavenly Father. In order to be tested, we must sometimes face challenges and difficulties. At times there appears to be no light at the tunnel’s end—no dawn to break the night’s darkness. We feel surrounded by the pain of broken hearts, the disappointment of shattered dreams, and the despair of vanished hopes. We join in uttering the biblical plea “Is there no balm in Gilead?” We are inclined to view our own personal misfortunes through the distorted prism of pessimism. We feel abandoned, heartbroken, alone. If you find yourself in such a situation, I plead with you to turn to our Heavenly Father in faith. He will lift you and guide you. He will not always take your afflictions from you, but He will comfort and lead you with love through whatever storm you face."


At a particularly low point in my weekend, I got in my car and just took off.  I didn't know where I was going, I only knew that I couldn't stay where I was at.  The rain pouring outside seemed to match my mood.  As I flipped through the radio stations hoping for some "angry music," I was surprised at myself when I heard a familiar song and removed my finger from the radio dial. 


Where can I turn for peace?  Where is my solace
when other sources cease to make me whole?
When with a wounded heart, anger, or malice,
I draw myself apart, Searching my soul?


Where, when my aching grows, Where, when I languish, 
Where, in my need to know, where can I run?
Where is the quiet hand to calm my anguish?
Who, who can understand? He, only One.


He answers privately, Reaches my reaching
In my Gethsemane, Savior and Friend.
Gentle the peace he finds for my beseeching.
Constant he is and kind, Love without end.



I then knew, without a doubt, where I needed to go.  As I sat and contemplated, a scripture that I had read earlier this week came to my mind.  There had been a prayer in my heart that reflected this particular oration from Alma 34:18.  

"Yea, cry unto him for mercy;

for HE is mighty to save."

He answers privately, Reaches my reaching
In my Gethsemane, Savior and Friend.

When the whole world seems like it is falling apart...
When I feel like I am doing my best but can't seem to conquer on my own...
When I feel alone...
When I don't know where to go...
When one more straw might just break my back...

I know where to run. 

He is My Savior, my Friend, my Strength and my God.  He is always beside me so that I am never alone.  When I am lacking, He makes up the difference.  The miracle is that no matter how much that difference is, He reaches me.  He fills the void with light and life.  It is during this time of the year where I am especially grateful for His sacrifice and love for me.  Without Him, there would be no meaning or purpose.  If there's one thing that I can be grateful for during this season, it is my Reedemer.

Grateful.